7:58AM DukeALERT — Transportation Notice
All Zagster bikes in use. Please wake up 10 minutes earlier and take a C1.
8:16AM DukeALERT — Transportation Notice
C1 at capacity. Please refrain from cramming onto the bus and remember to stand behind the yellow line.
9:00AM DukeALERT — Public Safety Notice
That one tile outside French Family Science is fully unstable today. Please use caution when entering the building.
9:52AM DukeALERT — Public Sanity Notice
Trash can outside Pavilion has reached critical mass. Do not attempt to stack boxes.
10:04AM DukeALERT — Money Alert
Someone donated several million dollars to Duke.
11:21AM DukeALERT — Sexual Assault
Sexual assault reported off of East Campus.
12:06PM DukeALERT — Public Sanity Notice
Fryer at “Edens Café” is not functioning. Half of menu unavailable.
1:24PM DukeALERT — Public Sanity Notice
Econ101 canceled.
2:13PM DukeALERT — Moderate Weather Policy
Sidewalks are fully flooded. Please use caution and rainboots (Hunter, please) when walking through campus.
3:06PM DukeALERT — Transportation Notice
BlueZone completely full.
4:54PM DukeALERT — Sexual Assault
Sexual Assault reported on West Campus in Edens.
6:02PM DukeALERT — Press Notice
The Chronicle has published something trivial, incendiary, or both.
6:25PM DukeALERT — Transportation Notice
Duke Police making rounds in BlueZone. Please move your car from commuter lot if you are not a commuter. Hurry.
7:40PM DukeALERT — Severe Weather Policy | Scientific Breakthrough
Von Der Hayden Pavilion has reached absolute zero.
8:02PM DukeALERT — Sexual Assault
Sexual assault reported on West Campus in Craven Quad.
9:31PM DukeALERT — Fire
Real fire in Kilgo. Please evacuate to your nearest exit. This is not a drill despite the several dozen false alarms that go off per semester.
10:14PM DukeALERT — Transportation Notice
DukeVans operator on snack break. Call back in 50 minutes.
10:34PM DukeALERT — Sexual Assault
Sexual Assault reported off of East campus.
11:56PM DukeALERT — Sexual Assault
Sexual assault reported at Shooters II Saloon.
1:42AM DukeALERT — Sexual Assault
Sexual assault reported at Shooters II Saloon.
2:10AM DukeALERT — Sexual Assault
Sexual assault reported on Central Campus.
–Scroll down for 35 more messages–